Popular

Whenever I see someone less fortunate than I
And let's face it, who isn't less fortunate than I?
My tender heart tends to start to bleed
And when someone needs a makeover
I simply have to take over!
I know, I know exactly what they need!

And even in your case
Though it's the toughest case I've yet to face
Don't worry, I'm determined to succeed!
Follow my lead
And yes indeed, you will be

Popular!
You're gonna be popular!
I'll teach you the proper poise
When you talk to boys
Little ways to flirt and flounce
Ooh!
I'll show you what shoes to wear!
How to fix your hair!
Everything that really counts to be

Popular!
I'll help you be popular!
You'll hang with the right cohorts
You'll be good at sports
Know the slang you've got to know
So let's start
'Cause you've got an awfully long way to go!

Don't be offended by my frank analysis
Think of it as personality dialysis
Now that I've chosen to become a
Pal, a sister and advisor
There's nobody wiser!
Not when it comes to
Popular!
I know about popular
And with an assist from me
To be who you'll be
Instead of dreary who you were
Well, are
There's nothing that can stop you
From becoming popu-ler lar
La la, la la!
We're gonna make you pop-you-lar!
When I see depressing creatures
With unprepossessing features
I remind them on their own behalf
To think of
Celebrated heads of state
Or specially great communicators!
Did they have brains or knowledge?
Don't make me laugh!
They were popular!
Please!
It's all about popular
It's not about aptitude
It's the way you're viewed
So it's very shrewd to be
Very very popular
Like me!
Why, Miss Elphaba, look at you You're beautiful!

I, I have to go

You're welcome

And though you protest
Your disinterest
I know clandestinely
You're gonna grin and bear it!
Your new found popularity!
Aah!
La la, la la!
You'll be popular!
Just not quite as popular as me!